Overwhelmed and going under

This thing lives in my chest

It stifles and strangles me, wheezing tight sips of blessed breath 

between gnashing teeth and a clench-locked jaw

I want to scream, I want to cry, I want to die

I want to say all the pretty words

I want to sing pretty melodies

with crafty, competent accompaniment

But this thing lives in my chest, rent free

No taxes, no overhead, no HOA, no finders fee

Through tight thoughts and scrunched foreheads,

 throbbing veins and squinting eyes

I want to scream, I want to cry

This thing bubbling over 

 a roiling boil, yet it never rises to the top

Oh, let the mercies of God keep me.

- cocoaTea.poetry

Cravicious

This hunger for God is a craven, glut that ought be shamed

but rather, I glory in my greed for His glory and grace.

- cocoaTea.poetry

Too much and not enough of this God

I am NOTHING

in light of His everything-ness 

I WEEP

He is too much, I am undone

I EXIST 

by the providence and plan of a Divine One

To be colloquial,

I eh able nah

When I think about the vastness of my God

I exist, yet I am nothing, I weep for He is soo much.

- cocoaTea.poetry

composed 26.8. 2023